Sometimes they cause my eyes to leak; other times my face breaks into a grin or a faraway time and place. Regardless, they dredge up the best and the worst times of our lives.

Memories. We all have them. Try to focus on the good ones because concentrating on the bad ones is depressing and fruitless unless you seek misery — and of course, there are those who do.

My choice is to be positive, centering thoughts on the best memories which are those that evoke smiles, chuckles and what used to be. No, we cannot recapture the past. It’s necessary to move forward regardless of our station in life.

Reminiscing is fine — but we cannot go back. So, feel sad; then feel glad that you have so many memorable moments of adventure, love and the commonplace of everyday contentment.

What a comfort that is. To feel content. Every single day, I miss my husband. Every single day I recall good, and even wonderful, memories of our lives together. Each is precious and cherished.

The bad times with the struggles, challenges, anger, remorse and myriad of other emotions and reactions have not been erased. They have not been pushed to the forefront either. Keeping them in their proper perspective comes easier for some than others. Sweeping them under the rug isn’t realistic. You can put them out of sight, but they are still there. They are an important part of the bonding with a loved one.

The rough roads, when approached together, strengthen relationships and cement the ties that bind.

As these words are penned, I’m on a trip to where it all began. So much has changed since 1963, but much is the same or at least evokes the same feelings. The memories are forced out of retirement and move to front and center.

Yesterday was spent with family members at my niece’s home in the little village of Britton, Mich. We lived just two doors down.

This is where my four siblings and I graduated from high school and where four of us met our spouses. We lived literally right next to the railroad tracks.

Sitting on the deck yesterday, I was caught unawares as the train rumbled right outside her backyard. On so many levels, in a brief time I was transported back to earlier years. Of course, there aren’t as many trains as there used to be, but some things are so ingrained they become automatic.

When the rumbling got close, everyone stopped talking, mid-sentence — a habit developed because we were so close to the tracks that you literally could not hear a word spoken right into your ear.

As the last car thundered past, we all jumped right back in to finish the interrupted sentence. Back in the day, we might miss the most important line in a TV program because remote controls hadn’t been invented, nor was it possible to pause a show.

When that first train tumultuously disrupted us momentarily, my mind was elsewhere. My gaze was intent on the tracks to the exact spot where my late husband and I met — right on the tracks.

Yes, my heart fluttered a bit. Yes, it was a bittersweet moment. My next thought was how grateful I was to have been blessed for all those years with his love and devotion.

Main Street looks different yet the same. Uncle Davey’s Ice Cream now occupies the old barber shop. An antique shop is now located in the former grocery store. One storefront is empty. Denny’s Bar on the corner is now the Bullpen Sports Pub.

The Former Mobil station, with a scratch in the showcase glass from my engagement ring, was torn down to build a bank, now vacant. The old post office is gone. The new one is next door to my niece’s home. The grain elevator is closed, as is the hotel.

A car wash on the east end of town sits where a produce stand stood. Across the street is a gas station/party store/pizza place. The funeral home hasn’t operated as such in decades. The same four churches still stand.

Back in the day, I could name each occupant of every house or business on the boulevard. Except for my niece, I don’t know a soul who lives in the village.

Memories have a way of becoming vague or romanticized. Keep the good ones alive. Write them down. Share the stories with your posterity. Develop a deep sense of gratitude that you had them at all.

Life is neither good nor bad. Attitude determines which way we see it. It’s very good if you look for it and count your blessings instead of your troubles.

The Lord didn’t bless me with extra days to wallow in self-pity, so look out world.