I doubt there’s a single kid today who doesn’t remember mom screeching this at the top of her voice. Chances are, the kid wasn’t listening, or she wouldn’t have “inquired” in such a shrill way. Usually, this common family event happened because junior decided he wanted to do something mom said “no” to already. Or maybe he was about to do something dangerous — you know, like jumping off a roof to see if he could fly like Batman.

Owls like me see this all the time. Kids listen with more rapt attention to the “kid on the playground,” who is deemed worldly-wise beyond all recognition than to mom or dad. In later life, when we become the screecher, we wonder why our own kiddos don’t listen. Then it comes to us as a blast of lightning, or fireworks at the Trash Pandas game, “you hear only what you want to.”

Yes. You can see this hasn’t changed, no matter how old you are. Everyone likes to hear praise, while few ever want to hear they aren’t “the cat’s meow” or the Owl’s “hoot.” Ever wonder why that is? My guess is this. It is because so few of us give recognition to those who did well, but we are quick to criticize. We do what we’ve learned to do, or in the case of praise, not to do. It’s so easy these days. Times ago, your complaint was to your brother at the bar, or the ladies at the hair dresser. There it stayed. Now any whiner on earth can go online and send his wails and woes to the whole world. And because everyone is attracted to like-minded whiners, whole legions of collective tear-slingers meet on social media, to the exclusion of any dissenting opinion. We don’t stop and say “good job” or “I like what you did” to any of the real people who cross our path. How do I know? I know, just like you will know in just a minute.

I’ll bet you can remember almost each and every time someone cheered you on for something you did growing up. You can almost see the faces and circumstances on the day when your coach said, “Bob, great job on catching that line drive out there.” Or how about when your French teacher commented after class, “Jill, you did remarkably well today. If you keep at your language skills, it will change your life.” Who doesn’t remember seeing dad on the sidelines cheering your home run slam in third grade? You see, it is such a seldom event, this praise for a job well done, that we remember it like gold discovered in the back yard the rest of our lives. Why do you think that is?

That is because we don’t stop to ask why it isn’t more common to give a moment of honest cheer to a job well done. Why, there’s even a group of snooty know-it-alls these days who say, “Now everybody gets praised for every little thing.” Your expected response is to say, “Yeah!” We Owls would say sure, you can always overdo anything. But then again, how about doing something good, like giving praise in the first place, and worry about over-doing it if that happens later. I remember how touched I was when, on flying by a grammar school, I discovered the students in one class were to write a personal note to each of their fellow classmates. In it, they were to say something nice they’d noticed about that student. Or how about the high school teacher, who wrote a note of recognition to each of her students? One high schooler was reduced to tears, because “no one ever said something so nice to me in all my life.”

Did you know you can sign up to be an honorary grandma or grandpa in Decatur? Or how about being an honorary big brother or big sister for some little brother or sister who needs you? You are needed because there are situations where such people as you are like a buried treasure. You’re needed, not just by the recipient of your concern, but for yourself too. Sad to say, real people need to share a sense of belonging with each other. Some might call it caring, or love. They need to share it with someone real, not as an emoji on a photo that is gone in an instant, like a whiff of smoke. Or maybe you can try, even today, even now, to tell someone you like what they did. Take the time to call someone who might need a boost, an “attaboy” or “attagirl.” They could maybe even benefit from your experiences. You might even find you start a conversation, in real time, really facing one another. After all, the unexamined life is not worth living, as some bright spark once said. If you let someone know you’ve reflected on what they’ve done, and feel compelled to express your thoughts about it, they might remember it the rest of their lives.

If you do, make it count. Think before you speak. Listen to what they say. Your little talk with them might be something they’ll remember the rest of their lives.